Category Archives: Reflective



2016 Goodbye. What a year. Some good. Some bad. Some unpredicted election results and deaths of some of our most treasured icons. It was a year that forced all of us out of our respective “Closets” as it were. Liberals, bigots, racists really we got to see each others true feelings. Everyone had an opinion about everything and social media became the main venting place for all to let each other have it. Facebook had a record number of unfriending and blocking situations that I’m sure mark Zuckerberg didn’t see coming.

SO 2017. Let’s turn the page and take a step forward into what I hope we be a more collaborative vs dividing year. With that said, I thought I’d begin a new tradition of creating a “Stop It” list. You may want to create one as well. This list allows me my last vent for 2016 about things I want people to stop doing. Not that they will stop but just saying it makes me feel better. If you disagree with my list, then make your own and post it.

It’s like good therapy.


  1. STOP OVER EXFOLIATING YOUR FACES! Too much of a good thing like scrubs, peels, retinol, any of the cosmetic acids, Clarisonic brushes, buff puffs, enzymes, and micro daily whatchamacallits are making everyone look dehydrated and making the incidents of rosacea and adult acne go through the roof. So stop it. Use these a few days a week vs everyday please.
  2. STOP OVER DRAWING YOUR EYEBROWS! I like an enhanced natural brow but come on! Those big brunette comas your placing above your eye area because some inexperienced beauty blogger told you to? No. Stop it.
  3. STOP BUYING/WEARING THOSE CONTOUR/HIGHLIGHT KITS! Regular people do not need these for daytime real life looks. If you have your own Net Flix series, then you can keep doing it. If not? Stop It!
  5. STOP SAYING/TELLING PEOPLE HOW BLESSED YOU ARE. This should be self explanatory. If you don’t understand, well, perhaps you may have a little problem in this area. Stop it.

Well I feel better. Please let me know your TOP 5 Stop It’s to begin 2017! But just don’t ask me to copy and paste it.





As your Cyber Main Gay and  self professed beauty junkie, you know that I sometimes have a penchant for expensive beauty products. I received a text yesterday from a woman who said “Harvey! $900 for a throat cream? That’s more than my mortgage! Have you lost your big gay mind?” Well she didn’t say “big gay mind” but I think that sounds more dramatic when I share it at cocktail parties, don’t you? Anyway, you get the point.  So I’m interrupting my 2011 Emmy Countdown to plant my feet firmly on the ground where many Americans are having a tough time because of the economy. I get it. I’m not spending like I use to right now either. At the same time I want to feel pretty and use products that I know work!

And the three I’m getting ready to share OUTPERFORM their department store competition! Take note girls! These are STEALS that make you feel like you SPLURGED!


RoC Retinol Correxion Deep Wrinkle Night Cream

ALLURE Magazine Editor’s Choice Award winner that really works! Look younger or your money back guaranteed! They also have a sensitive skin formula. Around $19 compared to department store products at $250-500.


Check out this Clinical Study for the facts!

Revlon Color Stay Make Up  Best long wear formula to this day! 16 hour flawless finish that feels great! Around $13 compared to department store brands at $45-80.


L’oreal Voluminous Mascara  This is always my number 1 pick for best in class! Builds lashes to 5x their original size! Gorgeous and long wearing! Around $ 7 compared to department store brands at $25-85.{userdata//d+d//|diagnostic|main:pdp//objectid+Cos36a_1//{pdp_tab:pdp_overview//objectid+Cos36a_1//}|media:_blank|nav|overlay:_blank}

So now  I’ll sleep better tonight knowing that my girls can be beautiful and save for a rainy day. Or at least save for that new pair of shoes you have your eye on!













Hello my darlings1 I’m taking a break from my Emmy 2011 Countdown to help all my kittens get ready for fall. I know that many of you are  sending the kiddie’s back to school so let’s have a little ME time! Clients are texting hourly  asking for my perspective on  fall make up trends, so here you go!  As your Cyber Main Gay I have to tell you I’m a little tired of “Au Natural” so please, let’s glam it up! Go into your bathrooms immediately and do a quick inventory! I know you have everything that gives you the “No Make Up Look” so don’t even consider buying another neutral.  Keep that look for day and now concentrate on a little glamour for night!  This season should be a breeze and add some budget relief   because you only need a few elements to update your look. No complete overhaul here! Think eyes and lips! Have an open mind! Try something new! I love Gwyneth Paltrow’s  philosophy on life and beauty! She proclaims “Beauty to me is about being comfortable in your own skin, that, or a kick-ass red lipstick!”  You rock Gwyneth! So let’s begin!

Step 1- Buy a red lipstick! It’s the must have color! Don’t say “I look horrid in red!” Instead say “Which shade of red complements my complexion?” Burn’t red, Cherry red, soft red, OMG there are a million! All my clients say “But it’s too bright!” Well when you’ve been wearing nude 24/7 for the last 10 years in going to definitely be a change. Come on Girls! Go for it!! I love Lancome’s L’Absolu Rouge shade Hold Up Red from their 29 ST Honore fall collection!é%3A-Fall-2011-Color-Collection-by-Aaron-de-Mey/whatsnew-29StHonore,default,sc.html

Step 2_ Wear color on your eyes. Try the deeper hues of plum or gray. Add a surprise with sheer mint green or blue. Yes blue is back. I won’t accept any whining till you find the shade that rights for you “Miss I always wear the same thing everyday!” I love YSL’s 5 palette eyeshadow from their delicious Midnight Garden Collection! Don’t let the mint green scare you! It’s super sheer and totally luminizing!,default,sc.html?cm_mmc=LabeliumSearch-_-Google-_-SiteLinks-_-YSL%20beauty&gclid=CPbB17Ke6aoCFQs0QgodiG7RPg


Step 3- Get ready! Take a breath!  Let your brows grow.I know I know! A brow change is difficult at best but  a fuller brow is in so give it a try. I’m not saying UNABROW, I’m saying natural brow with maintenance.  Let your brow girl or boy know what your experimenting with to give you the perfect look! Don’t just sit in the chair and say “The Usual please!”


My two fall  skincare picks are Kate Sommerville’s 24 Hour Pimple Punisher to banish zits and Lancome’s Visionnaire with LR2412 to erase pores and wrinkles! Each can be added into your current skincare protocols!,default,pg.html?cm_mmc=LabeliumSearch-_-GoogleBrand-_-Skincare-_-lancome%20visionnaire





Now, as soon as you drop off  little Wyatt and Tiffany at school, stop at Starbucks then go directly to your favorite store and have some fun! Remember “No Neutrals!”


Big Kisses to all the girls I adore!













2011 Emmy Countdown Continues! Vote For Mad Men’s Cara Buono!!!

Yes my pretties! We are moments closer to the 2011 Emmy’s to be aired on FOX September 18th! You already know that your Cyber Main Gay get’s incredibly excited before any major star award events. It’s sort of like Christmas but with better wardrobe and lighting!  My next big gay fab pick is for Outstanding Guest Actress in a Drama Series.  Who could it be? Think of  the fabulous dressed up 1960’s. Think Sex and Cigarettes.   Since some of you weren’t alive then, here’s a link to Banana Republic’s new limited Edition Clothing line created by the show’s designer!

I’m just mad about Mad Men! Especially my Emmy pick Cara Buono! I’m sure you know her story line but if you don’t here’s the grand gay rewind: The fabulous Cara landed her most widely seen role to date playing Dr. Faye Miller in 2008.  Dr Miller is a cool, cerebral market research consultant who joins the Mad Men agency Sterling Cooper, Draper and Pryce.  Cara is so exquisitely fabulous that it makes me want to channel the any one of those famous Alfred Hitchcock Blondes! Remember Kim Novak in Vertigo?  Any way, Dr Miller initially resists the advances of Don Draper, played by the gorgeous Jon Hamm, but of course eventually falls for his charms! Their relationship started to shut down as she grew close to the truth of Mr draper’s  secret identity and the fact that he eventually leaves her emotionally crushed by marrying his younger secretary Meagan Calvert.  What incredible performances by Cara! She must win! Take a look!

How did she become so fab? Born March 1, 1974 in Bronx New York, Cara was raised in a blue collar family with an incredible work ethic.  Which is probably why, at twelve years old, without telling anyone, she auditioned for Harvey Fierstein’s “Spook House” and landed the part! I love it when brains and beauty go together! She graduated from Columbia University where she earned degrees in English Literature and Political Science in three years!  You may have recognized Cara from my other guilty TV addiction “The Soprano’s“. She was equally fabulous as Kelli Moltisanti, wife to Michael Imperioli’s troubled mobster, Christopher Moltisanti, who’s killed by Tony Soprano. What a HOT couple!


Cara Buono is so multifaceted! Check out her website to learn more about this glorious creature!

There you have it Gorgeous!

We love you Cara! Can’t wait to see you on the Red Carpet!




XO Elizabeth

As your Cyber Main Gay I’ve loved many fabulous actresses in my life.  My love affair with Barbara Streisand started the first time I saw “Funny Girl!”  Bette Davis?  “All About Eve. ” Joan Crawford?  “Mildred Pierce. ” Judy Garland?  “The Wizard of Oz.”  Rosalind Russell?  “Auntie Mame.” And finally as we say goodbye to the most beautiful violet eyes ever created-Elizabeth Taylor in “Giant.” I wanted to wait a respectful few days to say farewell to Elizabeth. Gay men take their screen love affairs with actresses very seriously.

Now of course I’ve seen all of her films.   When I first saw her in the fabulous 1944 “National Velvet”, I wondered “Did she know she would be one of the world’s greatest stars?  How could she not with that face? ” Plus the fact that I cried like a big gay baby after viewing it! Elizabeth was known to say “I prefer animals to people.”  Lucky that her two first leading men were a dog and a horse.  She was also the original in “Lassie Come Home!” “Butterfield 8” that had Elizabeth playing a call girl won her an Academy Award.  “Cleopatra”, where she fell in love and eventually married Richard Burton.  They really were the Brangelina of their day! Quite a scandal!  “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?  Loved it because it was like watching my parents marriage. Passionate and brutal.  I thought Elizabeth would understand my  life after seeing that movie! “A Place in the Sun” with Montgomery Cliff” and “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof” with Paul Newman.  Two of the hottest leading men ever! My favorite though is “Giant”.  An epic, that in my opinion was the precursor to the “Dallas” and Dynasty” Tv shows!  Plus yummy Rock Hudson and smouldering James Dean? I’ve seen it a million times!  Of course I have to mention the 8 husbands.  Not going to go through all of them!  A girl is allowed to make a few bad choices you know!  My favorites are of course Richard Burton who was sexy beyond belief, and the man who gave her the incredible jewels!  Mike Todd, who was killed in plane crash a year after their marriage.  Elizabeth was supposed to be on that flight but fell ill suddenly. Mike told her she better stay and rest.  She loved him. Tragic.  Ultimately though, after a historic career, Elizabeth Taylor will be known as one of the greatest crusaders in the fight against AIDS!  She co-founded the American Foundation for AIDS Research[amFAR] which has raised more than 465 million dollars for AIDS research and treatment.  Later she started her own Elizabeth Taylor Aids Foundation. She was courageous in the beginning when no star wanted to touch the issue.  She ran to her Giant costar’s side when Rock Hudson was outted with the disease. She always seemed fearless.  Thanks for that Elizabeth!  As we say goodbye, the beauty junkie in me has to mention her top selling fragrances Pasiion and White Diamonds.  Funny that these sum her up in such a beautiful way. The most beautiful, passionate woman who was  as clear and bright as a perfect diamond.  Elizabeth Taylor  truly is Hollywood’s Last Great Star.

Rest in peace,



The Smart Woman’s Dermatologist!

As your Cyber Main Gay, you know I love a great party!  I’m so excited to emcee a “Girls Night Out with Betty Confidential!”  Hosted by Betty Confidential’s CEO Deborah Perry Piscione, with the proceeds going to Drake and Dominick/AVID

This evening is going to be a beauty blast!  Dr Vic Narukar will be demonstrating the latest non evasive skin treatments plus a free Latisse to make our eye lashes more glamorous! Can’t wait!

Dr Narukar, whose practice is  in San Francisco, is known as the “Smart Woman’s Dermatologist.” I had the chance to have a beauty chat and got the skinny on the latest and greatest. On a personal note, he loves animals and is a huge supporter of the ASPCA .  He’s also a engaged with Project New Start, to give kids a second chance at living fulfilling lives! You have to love a man who helps animal and children!

From a medical perspective, Dr Narukar is passionate about embracing techniques and materials that are on the cutting edge!  He’s positioned perfectly in the Silicon Valley, which is the incubator for pharmaceutical companies and tech innovations that help with overall image and  well being!  What I love about Dr Narukar is that he truly understands the anatomy of the face and neck, and never  gives an unnatural or “Over Filled” look!  You know what I’m talking about girls!  He told me “It’s not the filler, it’s the person doing the filling that makes the difference! ”  He strives to achieve a natural look-Less is more!  If you’re considering having any procedure  performed, find a Board Certified Dermatologist in your area.  A great resource for this is New Beauty Magazine.


Plastic surgery has seen major improvements in the last 5 years.  Dr Narukar believes in the ‘Holy Trinity”-Botox , Juvederm, followed with Thermage skin tightening and Fraxel Laser resurfacing. All non evasive with minimal down time!  This series of treatments relaxes fine lines, tightens and firms problem areas, improves skin texture and clarity, erasing any sun damage or acne scarring that makes us appear older.   The days of having to go “under the knife” and hide away for a month are over!  This new approach leaves you looking refreshed and honestly years younger.  If you’re seeking major structural improvements like upper eye lids, sagging jaw line, or you are thinking about a brow or face lift, these  evasive procedures have moved light years ahead as well.  Here’s a link to start your journey if you’re considering taking this path!


As a beauty junkie you know I love skin care!  Remember that a face lift can’t bring radiance back!  Dr Narukar is a believer in skin care!  His top picks are the tried and true Retin-A  and the fabulous TNS serum!

Retin-A is still the gold standard in anti-aging for skin’s that can tolerate it.  If you’re sensitive, Poetry in Lotion is a nice Retinol alternative!  Most importantly, Dr Narukar recommends a baseline skin exam  once a year especially if you’re at high risk.  Melanoma is serious girls and I want you safe and protected!







Train Wreck? Hot Mess? Who Cares! Academy Awards Gay Replay!!

                                                    As your Cyber Main Gay, you know I’d never miss the Academy Awards!  It’s truly a gay Holy day that keeps me glued to the TV.   Long?  Boring?  Crazy?  It doesn’t matter!  Add two hours of Red Carpet fashion drama commentary prior to the broadcast and stir.  You’ll have have one of the best wicked glamour cocktails ever!  Every year there’s the “Who’s hosting” drama to make sure we tune in!  Who will give the craziest speech?  Participant or Presenter?  Who’s drunk?  Who feels shunned by the Academy?   Who will be arrested for DUI after the Governor’s Ball? LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!  Hosting the Academy Awards must be  a daunting task.  The Academy took a break this year from people who are funny for a living, like  Alec Baldwin, Steve Martin and Whoopi Goldberg.  They opted for eye candy Anne Hathaway and yummy James Franco to attract a younger demographic.  Both very talented actors indeed!  How did they do?  The Hollywood Reporter said “Is it a bad idea to have actors as hosts?  NO.  It was spectacularly bad. ”  Ouch.   As a stylist I give them a 10 for image!  Anne Hathaway was spectacular in all 8 gown changes during the telecast.  Her best?  Archival Vintage  Red Valentino she wore  on the arm of Valentino himself!   I got gay chills!!  James Franco looks good in anything he wears except for the “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend” pink gown.  Not his best color!  I admire their courage for taking it on!  The craziest moment for me was Kirk Douglas presenting Best Supporting Actress.  It was like  Grand Pa’s keeper fell asleep, and he escaped to present at the Academy Awards.  At 94 he’s still gorgeous!  What an actor!  Best dressed men and Presenters?  Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr!  I love it when men don’t automatically go to the black tie uniform.  They looked great in blue and their presentation was beyond genius!  Loveliest moment?  Staten Island PS22 chorus singing “Over the Rainbow.”  Thanks Judy Garland for leaving us that legacy!


Best Dressed Women?  Red was definitely the color of the evening!  Jennifer Lawrence In Calvin Klein and Sandra Bullock in Vera Wang,  Spectacular!  Show Stopper?  The stunning tangerine Atelier Versace worn by the ultra skinny Jennifer Hudson.  She looked so fab I almost called Jenny Craig during the awards!  Their point system really works!  I decided to finish my popcorn before making the call!  My favorite actress of the evening who wins Best Everything-Hair-Makeup-Gown is  Reese Witherspoon  in black and white Armani Privee.    Perfection!     Just so you know the main difficulty for stylists during this special day is make up and  lighting.  The event begins with natural daylight and ends late,  virtually in the dark at the post Oscar Balls.  It’s a nightmare.  Add HDTV and it’s a holy terror!  A good example of why we need to be careful is Sharon Stone.  The normally stunning face of Dior cosmetics has on a little too much concealer and foundation that makes her look older than she is!  She has amazing skin that’s not apparent  in this photograph.  The choice of dark eyes and lips accentuated the problem as well.  It’s a lesson for us all.  Make up is important and lighting is everything!  Well here’s to the 83rd Academy Awards!  Already looking forward to 84th……….

And the Oscar goes to……………You Gorgeous!